Gems from Ems

Ee is a queen of one-liners, which are usually not meant to be funny yet somehow dh and I crack up and can't keep a straight face. That just pisses her off and she tells us, "Stop laughing at me!"

So the past week or so she has been having issues with her panties. Maybe I need to buy her a bigger size or something because she is constantly pulling them out of her nether regions. (Not a very attractive habit on a girl). Last night she had her pull-up on already right before bed and had to pull it out from her girly parts. I asked what was going on and she exasperatedly told me, "Mom, they are stuck up there!" I asked why and she said, "Its like a magnet!" Yes, honey, it is, but let's hope that magnet doesn't start attracting men until you are 28 or so.

EE also gets lectured quite a bit on her attitude (you would swear she was a hormonal 12 year old most days) and showing her parents respect. Everyday. More than one time a day. Has all that lecturing sunk in yet? Appararently not. So once again I was telling her she better have a better attitude, yada yada yada, blah blah blah and she turns to me and says "Mom, I'm having a flashback." Gee, really? To me giving you this speech 6 hours ago? Where does she come up with this stuff?

She is also very bright and curious. We have taught her the semi-correct catch all phrase for female body parts below the waist (I realize you don't pee from your vagina, but it works for us). She has known that for awhile. We are a house that is 75% girls, so she doesn't get much exposure to boy parts. She has seen her two younger boy cousins' "junk" but hasn't asked too many questions. She knows boys pee standing up but girls haven't mastered that feat yet (most boys haven't either, I've heard). Dh was getting dressed and EE saw that his boxers had a hole in the front. She decided it was a peep hole and tried to get a look. After trying to fend her off and let her know that is not okay, she asked, "I just want to know what its called!" Of course dh and I react like good parents--we both fall into fits of laughter and try to change the subject (we try to be open and honest in our family, can you tell?) Finally dh says "Your mom will tell you" to which I answer, "I'll tell you before nap time." At nap time she is anxiously waiting by the edge of her bed for the great mystery to be revealed. I let her know that what boys have is called a penis. To which she says "Oh, I haven't heard of that before" and proceedes to become immediately more interested in something else--like trying to tie her feet together with a belt. Sex talk over, I think it went well. ;)