Dh and I have been married 10.5 years. In that time we've had our ups and downs, just like any couple. We've weathered major life events and all the little things that come inbetween.
In 2003 dh and I went on a long weekend vacation to Denver to visit his brother and SIL. This was the first time we'd taken an actual vacation and we had a lot of fun. Dh grew up in Denver and we visited his old neighborhood and school, favorite restuarants like Casa Bonita, and the mecca of Mile High Stadium. A day after we got back from vacation, dh lost his job. The company he worked for was supposedly "over budget" for the year so they were cutting people, although they were brining in record profits above and beyond expectations (he worked for an oil refinery--that place is still probably raking in the dough and would've never noticed dh's annual salary if he was still there). Out of the blue. No warning. Did I mention I was 6 month pregnant with our first baby? Yeah, nice. Cut the guy with a pregnant wife. Luckily I was still working and had health insurance through my job. (On a side note, that was the best insurance ever--the birth of EE including an extra hosptial stay for me and hip ultrasounds for her after birth cost us $10. Seriously.) Anyway, it wasn't the best time--new baby, stressed out dad trying to find a job--you get the picture.
Another major life event we went through was the birth of our second daughter, LC. Again, I will post more on that later, but considering at least 75% of my readership at the moment knows her history I think you'll be able to follow along. All through her birth, hospital stay, and going home dh was my rock. I remember one night soon after she was born we were talking and I asked "Why?" His reply was you can't really ask why--there is no answer to that. You just deal with what it is in the best way you can. He was very rational about everything and helped keep me calm when I was stressing. The whole experience actually brought us closer together.
And now we come to yet another trying time. As you all know, EE had been sick and didn't go to preschool on Friday. I hear her saying "Hi, Dad!" late in the morning, so I go up to see why he is home. Me: "Are you sick, too?" Him: "No." Me: "Then why are you home?" Him: "Why do you think?" Fuck. Ladies, when dh comes home in the middle of the day from work it usually isn't good. At least not in my case; two out of two times it has meant he lost his job. We knew the company he worked for was having hard times because of certain aspects of the industry they are in. "Due to reorganization of our company, your position has been eliminated." Fancy way of saying "You make too much money so if we get rid of you, we can feel like we are saving some bucks." It doesn't matter that dh has been with them the longest and is the only one who does what he does. It doesn't matter that we just moved 3 freaking months ago.
Now what? I love where we live. Five years ago this is where we wanted to move, and how we have. I love EE's preschool and the great school district she was supposed to go to in the fall. I love our house. I love that my parents are only 1 hr away and are willing to babysit. I love that we are close to all the Cyclone events. I love that I have Target just minutes away. Did I mention that I love it here?
Life will go on, it always does. I have to keep the faith that things happen for a reason, although at the time we have no idea what that reason may be. That is always the hardest part--what is the reason for a baby being born with a birth defect and having to see them suffer? Why do you lose your job when you think life is going along great? Life's a bitch, so I'll bitch a little then wait see what happens next.
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3 comments:
Oh man Kristyn, that completely blows. I am so, so sorry. I hope he finds a new job quickly and that everything turns out okay. We just went through this in September so I know how you feel.
Oh Sh t! Ugh, that sucks, I'm so sorry. We haven't been through that since our 6 year old was an infant but I'll never forget that panic or stress, it was 4 months of hell. Although, it did end up being one of those life changing, blessing in disquise experiences--in the middle of it, it sucked.
Sendind positive thoughts that all works out quickly.
Oh Kris. I'm sorry.
Do you still want to host this weekend? I'll completely understand if you don't. JLMK. Happy Freaking Birthday, huh?
Love,
K
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